Oh, my good God. I am almost completely incapable of forming sentences. Okay, well, I did there. And there.
So I suppose I can construct simple sentences. I simply cannot make them say anything.
And it really, totally sucks ass. I want to connect with the Internets. I do. I love the Internets. Besides, were it not for the Internet and my mother and my aunt, I'd have no one. At all.
It's sad.
It's sad that I find myself wanting so much. I want people. Friends. Friends who are people. I want to get out and do and see and live. With people. Or even a person. Doesn't even have to be anyone tall. One, short, tiny person. I am not opposed to carrying said person in my pocket, if need be.
It's sad because I am not allowing.
I reach out, then I pull back again. And again. And again. And then I feel frustrated that the people don't follow me in an effort to help me and save me and see me and that they don't just know.
I mean, I don't even know.
I want but I do not allow.
It's easy-peasy to write it off as a direct result of giving so much of my time and energies to Rob. Sure. because I do. it's true. But I've been out there before. I can do it.
I just forget how.
Comments (10)
I had a little husband no bigger than my thumb,
I put him in a pint pot, and there I bid him drum,
I bought a little hankerchief to wipe his little nose,
And a pair of little garters to tie his little hose.
Or
Jerry Hall, he was so small,
A rat could eat him, hat and all.
Sorry. My life is nursery rhymes these days, and this is what I thought of when you mentioned keeping someone in your pocket. I'm glad to see you back. Welcome back, welcome out.
Posted by Sarahlynn | March 19, 2007 7:14 PM
Ah, yes. People who need people. Get out & come to the big city, girl! You have friends everywhere. I know Portland would treat you right. I'll even carry you around in my pocket if you like. :-)
Posted by SoggyCityBob | March 20, 2007 6:09 PM
I'm a little larger than pocket sized. But I can fit in all sorts of cool places, just the same. Come to Raleigh. You won't be able to get rid of me.
Posted by Jennifer | March 20, 2007 8:30 PM
I'm a short tiny person!
Oh yeah, I'm in a different state. Sigh.
This is my biggest fear about moving. I have my friends set here. If I move, I have to start all over, and I just don't know if I want to get out there and do it all over again.
But you should. You definitely should. It'd be worth it.
Posted by Lunasea | March 21, 2007 12:36 AM
Sarahlynn, what the hell nursery rhymes are those? Very weird. Weirder than the usual ones!
BOB! Hooray! Hi!
I do know a few folks in Portland. I'll be right over. Will you put me up for the night?
Oh, Jennifer! I would LOVE to come to Raleigh. Can I? Please?
What sorts of cool places?
Lunasea, yes, I miss having friends in town. Though, it's been six years. You'd think I would cease sucking.
Love you guys!
I am freaky-surprised anyone even read this! I have been gone so long.
Posted by trisha | March 21, 2007 1:20 PM
We've (well, I've) been waiting.
Posted by Lunasea | March 21, 2007 9:07 PM
People.
People who need people.
They're the LUCKIEST people in the woooorld.
Lovers, are very special people.
They're the LUCKIEST people in the woooorld.
Sorry. I had to sing the whole first chorus once it got goin.
I'd say c'mere and all, but you know.
I'm just like you.
PuSh.
Posted by Anne | March 23, 2007 4:54 PM
Can I be your friend? :)
Posted by Sarah R. | March 26, 2007 2:18 PM
Glad you are back, stunning picture...you need to get you an exhibit lady, your work is mah-velous...
Posted by lizziepea | April 2, 2007 10:35 AM
Here you are!
It's so easy to get lost in the kids, and the needy spouse's world, and then one day you wake up and the earth has shifted and you're standing there wondering what happened to the self, because damn-it she was cool and I'd like to hang with her and her people. I'm certain that I would be under lock and key if it weren’t for my cyber friends, but like you, I also need some real space friends. People I can see, and touch on a day to day basis, people i like and who like me. We had people once, and they are out there...somewhere.
Community building is such hard work. I wish it were as easy as it was when we were kids.
Dang it, Trish, I've missed you- (but I've been lurking around your flicker which is way too cool)
Posted by Anonymous | April 2, 2007 3:54 PM